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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29681829">They Didn't Say Goodbye (TsukkiYama)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/NinNinCyzia/pseuds/NinNinCyzia'>NinNinCyzia</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Accident, Boys In Love, Childhood Friends, Confession, Death, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Homophobia, Homosexuality, Love, M/M, Music, One-Shot, Pain, Sad, friends - Freeform, happiness, relationship, supportive parents</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-16 01:09:04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>9,506</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29681829</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/NinNinCyzia/pseuds/NinNinCyzia</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>'How can I relate to a song written by a child? You see, sometimes kids know more about the cruelty of reality then we are aware off.<br/>They know that even if something started with the best possible way, there'll be something or someone to tear it to shreds. Because in this world happy endings don't exist, even if you're just two dinosaurs in love.'</p><p>-----<br/>One-shot based on a song "Dinosaurs in love" by Fenn Rosenthal.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Tsukishima Kei/Yamaguchi Tadashi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>They Didn't Say Goodbye (TsukkiYama)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>~Dinosaurs eating people~</p><p>Yamaguchi smiled to himself, when the song started to play in his mind unconsciously the second he saw his best friend, who was waiting for him at the crossing. His little sister is listening to this a lot recently and Tadashi couldn't help but think about Tsukishima every time he heard it. Of course, Tsukishima didn't know about it and freckled boy didn't think that he needed to.<br/>
"Tsukki!", he yelled, running to his friend. Kei didn't even notice it, while scrolling his playlist, but as soon as Tadashi reach his view, he turned to him and put the headphones down.<br/>
"You took your time today, huh?", he asked, hiding his phone in his schoolbag.<br/>
"Sorry Tsukki" Yamaguchi replied, giggling. Taller boy rolled his eyes and went ahead their way to school. The other went after him. "I brought you something today."<br/>
"Hm? What exactly?"<br/>
"Can't it be a surprise?"<br/>
"You know I hate surprises."<br/>
"Right..." Yamaguchi laughed nervously. "Okay so you know that my father get back from Europe this weekend, right?"<br/>
"Yeah, I had to tutor those two idiots all by myself because of it." Kei complained, receiving another nervous laugh from Tadashi in reply.<br/>
"Ehm, sorry about that again... I didn't know Yachi wasn't able to come too"<br/>
"No worries, go on."<br/>
"Uh, so, he came back and he gets that recipe from one of the restaurants that he was reviewing. It was for gingerbread and since you have a sweet tooth, I thought I'll make you some gingerbread men for lunch!" Yamaguchi explained with a wide smile at the end. Blond boy averted his gaze and clicked his tongue.<br/>
"I don't have sweet tooth, I don't know what you're talking about", he denied. "But thanks anyway, I guess".<br/>
"You're welcome." Tadashi smiled at him again, knowing that Tsukki was way more pleased with his gift then he was showing. After all sweets were always the only one thing he never refuses to eat, no matter how low his appetite was. "By the way, they're not decorated. I thought that it's a bit weird to eat something shaped and decorated as human beings for Christmas."<br/>
"Yeah, kinda" Kei agreed, shrugging his shoulders. "But it makes sense if you thought about Krampus, right?"<br/>
"Wasn't Krampus some sort of demon?"<br/>
"He was, but wasn't he supposed to eat people on Christmas? Maybe it's some weird way to trick him."<br/>
"You really think a demon would fall for that? Because I doubt it."<br/>
Tsukishima didn't answer for a bit, enwrapped in thought. Finally he found his reply: "It's stupid, but most people are stupid as well, so that theory isn't that unlikely as it may seem."<br/>
"Well, can't argue with that...", Yamaguchi said and after few seconds of silence they're both laughed. "Tsukki, out of curiosity: if you were a demon, would you eat me?", freckled boy asked, when he stopped laughing, causing the taller one to almost choke on his own saliva.<br/>
"I- Yams, what kind of question is this?"<br/>
"A weird one?", he replied carelessly. Kei sighed.<br/>
"What would you reply, if I ask you that, huh?"<br/>
"Hm... It'd be tough. You know I like salty food, but I don't think a salty gingerbread would taste good..."<br/>
"Yamaguchi... Are you trying to tease me?" Tsukishima asked, raising his eyebrows. Tadashi sent him an innocent smile.<br/>
"I don't know what you're talking about."<br/>
"Ugh, just shut up", he replied rolling his eyes, but after that he smiled lightly. After that he just turned his face back at the sidewalk in front of him. Tadashi snorted with laughter, following him. For the rest of their way they didn't speak much, but they didn't need to. The silence wasn't inconvenient for them as long as they were able to hear the sounds of each other's footsteps right next to them. That sound always made them both feel safe, even if they weren't aware of that yet.</p><p>~Dinosaurs in love~</p><p>"I'm home!", Yamaguchi yelled, taking off his shoes<br/>
"Dashi! Dashi!" A little girl run out of the living room with a big smile on her face. "Dashi! Tsukki liked our cookies, right? He liked them, didn't he?"<br/>
"He asked if we had more of them once he tasted them, so I guess our little mission is a success, Ai-chan" older Yamaguchi replied, kneeling on one knee to give his sister a high five. The girl laughed cheerfully.<br/>
"You should've told him to come, I wanted to play with him" she complained, getting her hair ruffled for it.<br/>
"I'll try to invite him tomorrow, alright? I can't promise anything though" he said with a warm smile.<br/>
"In that case you have to play with me instead", Aiko demanded with arms akimbo. She'd always been bossy, but somehow such behavior always manage to sweeten this freckled boy.<br/>
"You will play with your brother after dinner, Aiko." someone spoke up. "Welcome back, Tadashi."<br/>
Tadashi raised his head to look at his father.<br/>
"I'm home", he repeated with a smile. Yamaguchi Tamotsu was a well-known restaurant critic and a blogger, who often travels abroad for his job's sake. Because of that, he'd never been able to be at home often, but every time he was there, Tadashi felt generally better. Even if Tamotsu was absent for more then a half of his life, the boy always felt that his father is a person, that he could tell about every secret or worry he had and Tamotsu would not only understand but also help as much as he could. It was a bond between father and son that would never be broken.<br/>
"I'll go help mom prepare everything!" Aiko said with a big smile and in a second she disappeared in the other room.<br/>
"How was school?" Tamotsu asked, waiting for his son, while he was changing his shoes.<br/>
"Good, Suga-senpai praised me after the practice. Apparently if I keep up with progress in the way I'm doing it now, I won't even notice when I'll get to be in the first string", Tadashi replied. "Oh, also: another girl asked me to give Tsukki her confession letter. It's really getting exhausting", he add, putting a letter out of schoolbag.<br/>
"You didn't pass it?" Father raised his eyebrows, looking at the letter.<br/>
"O-of course I did! Tsukki said I could keep it, because he's 'not interested to go out with a random girl he hadn't even talked to and that doesn't even have a courage to confess on her own'."<br/>
"I guessed you felt relieved, huh?" his father asked with amusement, what baffled the freckled boy.<br/>
"Of course not, why, why would I?", he asked, blushing a little.<br/>
"I meant that he wouldn't have this much time for you, if he got himself a girlfriend, but that reaction is surprising. Why are you so embarrassed?"<br/>
"It was just weird question, that's all..." Tadashi replied, looking at the ground. For few second they were quiet, until his dad spoke up again:<br/>
"Tadashi, can I ask you a question?<br/>
"Sure? What is it?"<br/>
"Are you sure you're troubled by those letters because they aren't for you and not because they are specifically for Kei?"<br/>
Yamaguchi's mind froze for a moment.<br/>
"Eh?"<br/>
"Try to imagine a situation: you passed another love letter to Tsukishima, but this time he accepted it, how do you feel? Or if he tells you that he has a girlfriend already?"<br/>
Tadashi stayed quiet. He heard the question, but he didn't knew if he was even able to imagine it. After all, why would Tsukishima accept such confession in a first place? That part already didn't have much sense and to also imagine Tsukki in a relationship? Was it even possible? Kei had never pay much attention to any girl as far as freckled boy remembered. Well, <em>if</em> it is, then of course Yams would be happy for him, right? It's super obvious. Or is it?<br/>
"I-", he stopped, not knowing what to say next. He'd never really thought about it before, since it was always him and Tsukki and there had never been a moment when their  friendship was endangered by someone else. Now, when his father asked that stupid question, he felt... weirdly mad or even annoyed at the girl that doesn't even exist.<br/>
"You know Tadashi, this time when I was in Europe, I thought about you a lot, since on the west all those 'pride' things are more and more common and... It made me realize something. You've never had much girl-friends and all you talk about is this Tsukishima boy. I just want you to know, that if you have a thing for him, me and your mother will still love you, you know?"<br/>
"I don't" Tadashi replied quickly. When did this conversation turn into that direction?<br/>
"So you're sure that Kei is only a friend for you? I don't want to push you with it, but one day he may meet someone else and I don't want you to be hurt, Tadashi."<br/>
"I know", Yamaguchi sighed. "I- I think I'll skip dinner tonight. Sorry dad", he added, grabbing his bag.<br/>
Tadashi passed his father in the corridor and went to his room. He simply couldn't take it anymore. He shut the door and took a couple of deep breathes. He felt hot and he didn't like it. It should have been easier for him, shouldn't it? Did that mean that his dad might actually have a point? That he might really have such feelings for his childhood best friend? He raised his eyes on cabinet, where he had some pictures of them. They were always together since they joined the same club in elementary school. It just seemed so natural to follow this tall, cool kid that Tsukishima was in his eyes. He wanted to be like him, but now... He did that already, right? Only this year he had learnt to stood on the court as a pinch server. He even stood up to Tsukki, and moreover, Tsukishima told him, that he's really became "cool" out of nowhere himself. That would mean that they were even, so he didn't have to follow him anymore but... But he still wanted to. He just wanted to be beside him. To still be the closest one to him. To be able to look at him and talk with him about stupid things when noone is around.<br/>
But was it really love?<br/>
Suddenly his phone vibrated in his pocket.<br/>
"You know this?"<br/>
-Tsukishima sent a link.-<br/>
"It's called 'Krampus is coming to town' by Rusty Cage.<br/>
That's pretty much all I know about this demon, but the song is nice."<br/>
For a second Yamaguchi didn't know what he was talking about, but after a moment he recalled their morning conversation. He couldn't help but laughed. He listened to the song and when it ends, he replied:<br/>
"It's cool. But I still like the dinosaur song Ai-chan found more, don't you?".<br/>
"So funny."<br/>
Yamaguchi snorted with laughter again. After the screen turn off, he saw himself, just smiling stupidly at the phone. That was the moment he realized, he seriously felt for this salty, blond middle blocker. And that he probably smiled like this when he was messaging him in front of his teammates and family which was somehow embarrassing.<br/>
"Btw. Akiteru is throwing a party tomorrow, wanna join?", Tsukishima texted again. Yamaguchi raised his eyebrows in surprise.<br/>
"Since when are you going to parties?"<br/>
"I don't, but it'll be hosted in our house and I won't be able to focus.<br/>
I also don't want to be left alone with a bunch of drunk students, I'm getting headache just by thinking about it."<br/>
"Well, if Akiteru is okay with it, then why not?"</p><p>~Dinosaurs having a party~</p><p>Realizing that you have a crush makes everything more complicated. Before Yamaguchi would just wear anything that caught his eyes and go to Akiteru's party in it. Now he suddenly felt the urge to look good and looking good was way more harder then he imagined. He spent hour to choose the right outfit and another one trying to make the strand on the top of his head stop jutting out. What's even worse, eventually he had to give up anyway, so it was just a waste of time.<br/>
"Do I look at least acceptable?", he asked his parents, once he went into the living room.<br/>
"You look gor-"<br/>
"I think you overdid it a bit.", Tamotsu cut across his wife.<br/>
"No he didn't." Miss Yamaguchi said with her arms akimbo. Yamaguchi Momoka, because that was her full name, was a strong, independent woman which could easily be proven by the fact, that she was rising two children almost by herself. She was running her own small business as a florist, doing all the housework and look over both Tadashi and Aiko, to make sure they don't have any problems with school or in general. She was a strict perfectionist, but her heart always had a soft spot for her kids. After all, they both heir that adorable personality their father had. "I think you look gorgeous honey."<br/>
"Thanks mom", Tadashi replied with a nervous smile.<br/>
"But you're going to house party, not some kind of a ball", his father said, rolling his eyes.<br/>
"Who cares? If he really, ehm, like this boy as you claimed, then there's nothing to overdid" Momoka disagreed. She stood up and came up to her son, so she could adjust his butterfly tie. "It really hit you, huh?"<br/>
"I think you can say so", he replied looking down at her. "Ehm, but maybe suit is really too much? Should I go change?"<br/>
"Don't you dare", she said, poking his nose. "In the worst case scenario you'll make him laugh. Considering it's Kei we're talking about, it's a good thing, this kid should really smile more. I remember when you two were younger, he was so adorable back then" Miss Yamaguchi sighed, taking a step back to look at Tadashi once again. She'd prefer that it was some cute girl he dressed up like this for, but she still was proud of the way he grew up. Her handsome, freckled son.<br/>
"We were kids..."<br/>
"Yeah, but you for example still have that cute attitude. Hinata-kun also seems to be a good kid."<br/>
Tamotsu snorted with laughter, while Tadashi felt the temperature rising, when blood from his body run towards his cheeks.<br/>
"Mom, please can you stop?", he asked and Momoka just giggled in reply.<br/>
"Dashi likes Tsukki?"<br/>
Three pairs of eyes settled their gaze at a girl that showed up behind Tadashi. Aiko was looked at everyone in the room each by each, waiting for her question to be answered.<br/>
"Pro-probably", the freckled boy finally replied, averting his eyes.<br/>
"Probably?", she asked to make sure. Tadashi nodded. "So that means... Tsukki will be my brother!", she yelled happily. Their parents smiled to each other, amused by their daughter behavior. Her brother on the other hand, didn't really know how to react.<br/>
"That, I mean, he has to like me back to be you brother, so-"<br/>
"Then just don't screw that up"<br/>
"Aiko!', Momoka scolded her, while Tamotsu just burst with laughter.<br/>
"What? Papa always says that, when he's watching matches on TV", Aiko explained, what made the father calm down in a second.<br/>
"Ai-chan, what did papa tell you about snitching?"<br/>
"So you're not even trying to deny it?" Miss Yamaguchi looked even madder then before, so Tamotsu decided to change the topic. Better avoid the risk.<br/>
"Tadashi, if you don't leave now, you may be late."<br/>
Tadashi checked the hour in his phone, barely stopping himself from cursing. It wouldn't end up good for him.<br/>
"I need to go. I'll probably stay over at Tsukki's, so don't wait for me and don't be worry, okay?" he and waved at his parents. He ruffled his sister hair and rushed to the door. He didn't want to be late, since he knew how much Tsukishima hated such parties and he wanted to relieve him at least a little.</p><p>Kei's house was around thirty minutes away from Yamaguchi's, but at least he had some time to calm his thoughts. The sky was slowly turning darker, and he could even enjoy the view of pale stars appearing on the vault, what was indeed soothing. Especially consorting with a gentle breeze and the sound of Twenty One Pilots music in his headphones from the playlist Tsukishima recommended him.<br/>
"You finally came", Tsukishima said as a greeting, opening the door before Yamaguchi got to ring the doorbell. Apparently, he either saw him coming through the window, or he was already losing his patience for his brother's guests and needed support.<br/>
"Sorry Tsukki" he responded, giggling nervously. Kei sized him up and rised his eyebrows.<br/>
"Is this a suit?"<br/>
"Ehm, yeah?"<br/>
"You realized it's only my brother's party?"<br/>
"I didn't had anything else I could wear, okay?"<br/>
Tadashi really felt embarrassed. Tsukki was wearing his casual clothes, that he could wear anywhere else with anyone else. People in the house also seemed to be dressed way more comfortably then him. In the conclusion: he'd be standing out.<br/>
"To be honest, it looks pretty good on you."<br/>
Freckled boy froze astonished. He looked at Kei, who was already heading back to the crowd in the living room. He didn't laugh at him. He wasn't even sarcastic. Yamaguchi couldn't help but smiled widely. He got his shoes off as fast as he could.<br/>
"Tsukki, wait!", he yelled, trying to caught up.<br/>
As usual for a house party, there wasn't that much of people. Besides him and Tsukishimas, Tadashi spotted maybe around eight people and another two were arguing in the kitchen, when they were passing next to it.<br/>
"Wait, is this Shimada-san?", he asked, looking at his serves teacher, who was in the middle of the conversation with someone, who Yams didn't recognize.<br/>
"Yeah, Tanaka's sister and this middle blocker are here too", Kei responded. "The person next to him get dumped by a girl about ten minutes ago. Not gonna lie, it's quite enjoyable to watch." he added with a smirk, handing Yamaguchi tinned soda from the table. After he took it, Tsukki took one for himself as well.<br/>
"You're a terrible person sometimes", Tadashi claimed giggly.<br/>
"How can you say that, this person is making a scene as if he was performing in some cheap TV drama. It would be disrespectful to not enjoy it" Tsukki rebutted, making freckled boy even more amused. The man really seemed to exaggerate a little bit, probably due to alcohol. What's more, the sight of Mr Shimada trying to calm him down was also pretty funny.<br/>
"They got drunk quickly, didn't they?", Yamaguchi noticed and Kei nodded in agreement.<br/>
"Well, they're bunch of collage students thinking they can handle any amount of alcohol and old people trying to catch up, so it's not surprising."<br/>
Tadashi wanted to respond to that, but suddenly he felt someone's arm on his shoulder.<br/>
"Yamaguchi!" Akiteru smiled widely to the boy. "You're finally here, Kei was worried you won't be able to come!"<br/>
"I wasn't", Tsukki mumbled, taking a sip of his drink.<br/>
"When did you get here?" his brother continued, ignoring Kei's statement.<br/>
"Not even five minutes ago."<br/>
"You know, you made it right on time for karaoke! You're joining us, right?"<br/>
"I-"<br/>
"He's definitely not joining and neither am I." Younger Tsukishima stroke his brother's arm out off Yamaguchi's shoulder, pulling him closer to himself.<br/>
"If you change your minds, then remember you're both welcome to join" Akiteru said, completely not affected by Tsukki's attitude. He headed off to the rest of the group, leaving them alone again.<br/>
"It's going to be painfully long night" Kei sighed.<br/>
"If you want, we can just go to your room" Tadashi replied, smiling slightly to him. He himself felt rather good. The way Tsukki got all protective over him before... he didn't notice it before, but it surely made his heart beats faster. It wasn't that bad of a feeling.<br/>
"I can handle a little more. You didn't dressed up like that for nothing, right?"<br/>
"I told you already, I had nothing else to wear!"<br/>
"Of course", the blonde one replied with a smirk, which only make it sound more snidely.<br/>
The talk proceed, filled with complains about "shitty music", laughing at Akiteru's friends' behavior and some other not important things. Suddenly they got interrupted by Tsukishima's phone.<br/>
"It's Kuroo", the blond explained, after putting it out of his pocket. Without saying anything more, he left the room to pick up.<br/>
Yamaguchi stayed there, not knowing what he should do with himself. He didn't know that Kei kept in touch with Nekoma captain. He always seemed to be annoyed by the brunet, but in that case why would they even exchange numbers? And what was so important to leave him alone in the living room full of drunk and mostly unfamiliar people?<br/>
"Hey, Yamaguchi-kun!"<br/>
"Shimada-san?"<br/>
"You're finally alone." Black-haired man sighed with relief. Yamaguchi could clearly say he wasn't doing well after all the beer he drunk.<br/>
"Do you need some water, Shimada-san?", he proposed, but Shimada only shook his head.<br/>
"I wanted to talk to you, Yamaguchi-kun."<br/>
"Right, of course. What do you wanted to talk about?" Tadashi took a look at the room Tsukki went off to. He wasn't sure if he'll be able to handle drunk talk alone right now.<br/>
"You see, we were talking about all of you with the rest of cheering squad..."<br/>
"Mhm, cheering squad", he repeated, nodding his head, even though he didn't know if he got that right. He just wanted this talk to end this conversation.<br/>
"And you never really talk to me about anything else then volleyball! How can I be the best mentor if you don't trust me?"<br/>
"Of course I trust you-"<br/>
"Then let's talk" Shimada decided, handing him a glass of beer. Tadashi looked at it, even more lost then before. "Is there any girl you like?"<br/>
Tadashi took a slug, chucking at the bitter taste of it. He knew he shouldn't do that, then again: Kei was nowhere to be seen and Mr. Shimada didn't look like he was about to give up on that topic. One glass won't make him any harm, right?<br/>
"There isn't..."<br/>
"You don't need to lie to me" brunet said, pouting. "You may be surprised, but I'm actually pretty experienced at that matter. Tell me everything", he added proudly.<br/>
"But there really isn't anyone-"<br/>
"Yamaguchi-kun."<br/>
Yamaguchi pursed his lips, when he saw his teacher serious look. Guess there was no other option.<br/>
"Well, there might be someone", he admitted, looking at the glass.<br/>
"Go on."<br/>
Yamaguchi sighed, taking another couple of slugs.<br/>
"I'm pretty close to them already, but I don't think they're really interested in me. I mean, you know me, I'm not a boyfriend material at all, am I?"<br/>
"Of course you are!" Shimada stated, with hands on his hips. "You're an important part of Karasuno: the team that is one of the best volleyball teams in whole Japan. You're also very dedicated and nice young man, that knows how to treat another person with respect and that you can always depend on. There's no way any women could say no to you!"<br/>
Tadashi laughed, scratching his neck. A woman, huh?<br/>
"Thank you Shimada-san, but you don't need to cheer me up like thi-"<br/>
"Here's what you need to do!, Shimada cut him across and add more alcohol into his glass. "You have to be more confident. If you won't someone may steal her from you. Now as a practice: drink up!", he said with a smile.<br/>
"I don't think it's a good idea, Shimada-san-"<br/>
"You won't be sure unless you try it, will you? Come on, be a man!". Man slapped his back confidently. Tadashi once again tried to spot Tsukki anywhere to no effect. He didn't have any other choice then to listen to the older.<br/>
His head spinned, when he put the glass down after drinking all the contents.<br/>
"It makes everything better right off the bat, doesn't it?", the tutor said, clearly proud of either himself or Tadashi. Hard to say.<br/>
"Not really", Yamaguchi mumbled.<br/>
"You just need to get used to it." Shimada sent him a smile. "Oh, I like that song! Wanna sing together, Yamaguchi-kun?"<br/>
And just like that, Tadashi was dragged along to the other guests and the karaoke.</p><p>~They ate fruit and cucumber~</p><p>"I can't believe they got you drunk", Tsukki granted, passing him a bowl with a salad consist of fresh vegetables. Well, technically more then half of it were fruits since it was mainly salad, tomatoes and cucumber. He'd said before, that it would be better if he ate something. "This is fucking illegal, what were they thinking?"<br/>
Yamaguchi didn't respond. Instead he was just sitting silently on Kei's bed, looking down at the food. He felt guilty for making him mad, when he was supposed to make him stand that party better. He should've given air to Mr Shimada, but how could he know it'll end up this way? Moreover, Tsukki wasn't innocent either. He left for more then an hour and he knows Tadashi well enough to be aware, that he's not the most assertive person in the world. Why did it even take him so long to talk to that catty captain?<br/>
"How do you feel Yams?", the blond asked, kneeling in front of him.<br/>
"It could be better", Tadashi responded. "What took you so long?"<br/>
"We just needed to talk some, ehm, stuff, over." Tsukishima got up, just to sit on the bed next to him. He placed a bowl with strawberries between them, and Tadashi figured Akiteru must have given it to him as an apology.<br/>
"Some stuff?", he asked, getting a bite of his salad. "What kind of stuff?"<br/>
Tsukishima choked on the strawberry and looked at the bookshelf at his right. Besides the books, on the shelves there were also some figures, mostly dinosaurs ones, that he had since he was a kid. That made Yamaguchi remember his mother's words, about the way Kei was in elementary school. He smiled unconsciously.<br/>
"So what kind of stuff you were talking about?", he repeated.<br/>
"Ehm, I lent him... a <em>book</em>. He's about to come to Miyaji this weekend, so he'll be able to return it to me."<br/>
"You were talking about a book for an hour in the middle of the party."<br/>
"I know he doesn't look like it, but he's a bigger nerd then I ever was, he couldn't shut up."<br/>
Tadashi frowned. If it really was something like that, Tsukki would probably just tell him to bring it, when he'd be able to and hang up. Once again, someone's words came up to his head.<br/>
'You need to be more confident. If you won't, someone may steal her from you.'<br/>
No, no way. It's impossible for Tsukki to like Kuroo more, right? Of course, Kuroo might have taught him a lot, but Tsukishima wouldn't even try if it wasn't for Tadashi. It was him that was always there for Kei, so why would he leave him for some damn rooster? But, he shouldn't brag about it now, right?<br/>
"Tsukki", Yams started, picking up a strawberry. "Say 'aah'."<br/>
"Why would I?"<br/>
"Before I went out, my mum told me, that we should act more like when we were kids. And we used to do it a lot, remember?", he explained with a smile.<br/>
"You're drunk."<br/>
"And?"<br/>
Tsukishima sighed and opened his mouth, so Tadashi could feed him. Right after he did that, Kei turned his face in the other direction, covering it with the inner part of his elbow. Despite that fact, Yamaguchi could still see him blushing.</p><p>~They... fell in love~</p><p>Why did he do that? He wasn't sure himself. If it wasn't for alcohol in his blood, he probably wouldn't even dare. But then he was drunk, and the alcohol was telling him, that if he hadn't made a move in that moment, he would never be able to do so. That he would have lost him for someone who can't even make his hair normally. And he couldn't allow it.<br/>
He realized what happened when he moved away from his face. There was a sweet taste of strawberry in his mouth and he didn't recall eating any himself. And he had never seen Kei with such dumbfounded sight before. In a second he sober up.<br/>
"I- I'm so sorry Tsukki, I-"<br/>
"Shut up", Tsukishima commended with blushed cheeks.<br/>
"I'm really sorry, I didn't meant to-"<br/>
Tsukishima cut him across, kissing him shortly. He adjusted his glasses and now it was Tadashi that couldn't believe in reality.<br/>
"Just shut up", Kei said again, hiding his face in Yamaguchi's neck and putting his arms around him. Freckled boy felt like his brain was about to evaporate. He couldn't even move and the heat from the blood rushing to his face made him feel a little dizzy. Did he really just made a move on Tsukki? And Tsukki responded? Did he fell asleep without realizing?<br/>
"I'm... really happy right now, you know? So don't forget it, when the hangover will come", Tsukki whispered with weak voice, probably thinking that Yamaguchi wouldn't understand a word. But he did. He looked at Kei's short hair, and smiled slightly, before hugging him back.<br/>
They didn't hear the music outside the room. They didn't hear the noise that always accompany groups of students together with booze. The only things they heard were their breaths, getting calmer and calmer with every exhale, until they fell asleep. Sitting on the bed, without a quilt or a blanket. Just the two of them.<br/>
They had never slept so comfortable before.  </p><p>~'And then, what did they do?'<br/>
'They said thank you'~</p><p>The atmosphere was weird.<br/>
It wasn't uncomfortable, but something was for sure wrong and Yams could sense it. Tsukki wasn't himself that day. His comments during training were way more sarcastic then mischievous and he was also way more irritable then usual. Now they were in Yamaguchi's room, watching some bad-made horror movies, that they used to laugh at, when they had nothing else to do. This time Tsukki was barely saying anything, only responding to Tadashi's comments from time to time.<br/>
"Tsukki, what's wrong with you today?" freckled boy asked, since he couldn't stand it any longer. He shut the laptop down, and turn the other way, so he was able to look his boyfriend in the eyes without getting his head off his knees. It was too comfortable.<br/>
"Hm?", Tsukishima looked at him as he had just woken up from some sort of trance. Yamaguchi started to wonder, if the blond boy noticed, that the movie isn't even playing anymore.<br/>
"Something seems off and please, don't you try to act like nothing happened. I can see that."<br/>
"But everything <em>is</em> fine Yams", Tsukki responded, caressing his cheek gently. Yams closed his eyes for a moment. What a shame that it was only a mere trial to distract his attention. He grabbed his hand softly and move it away, although he didn't let go. Instead he crossed their fingers, smiling slightly, when he felt the finger tape on some of them. Tsukishima was really working hard lately.<br/>
"Kei." He looked back into Tsukki's eyes. He saw his lips pursing for a quick moment. He felt the grip tightening. At that second he was sure, that something did happen. He sat up and gave Kei a quick kiss. "You can talk to me, you know? Stop with that 'I-can-deal-with-every-problem-myself' attitude."<br/>
"It's really not that big of a deal" Tsukishima sighed. "I got into a fight with Akiteru this morning. Not the first and probably not the last time as you know. You shouldn't worry about it."<br/>
"Is this why you didn't wear the sport glasses today?"<br/>
"Yeah, and I won't wear it ever again" he mumbled in response.<br/>
"Tsukki... Don't you think you're exaggerating a little bit?"<br/>
"It's not me whining, they're just broken. I can't wear them whether I want to or not", he explained, rolling his eyes.<br/>
"Oh, I'm sorry then. Although, breaking them from one argue is-" Yamaguchi cut, seeing the look in Kei's eyes. It wasn't him that broke them. The thing is: Yamaguchi'd never seen Akiteru really mad at his little brother before, so what did they argue about if he even broke his present for him? He loved his little brother and before whatever Kei said, Akiteru was just always laughing at it. The case was way more serious then Yams thought. "I should just shut up, I'm sorry."<br/>
"Don't be. I'd also thought that it was me who broke them not him if I were you. I just didn't expect him to react like that."<br/>
"React to what?"<br/>
Tsukki took a peek at their fingers. Mindlessly, he started stroking the top of Tadashi's hand.<br/>
"I told him about us. He didn't like it apparently."<br/>
"<em>Akiteru</em> didn't?" Yamaguchi couldn't believe it. It felt just too unrealistic. After all Akiteru always seemed as a good person, and what's more: he seemed to like Tadashi as a person. Why would he not 'like' it?<br/>
"I was shocked as well, but for him I'm only making my life harder and bringing shame on myself", he said dismissively, putting a smirk on his face. Tadashi felt his heart getting pierced in his chest. He had never felt such an urge to punch someone. How could Akiteru say something like this to his own brother? And why did Kei still want to act like everything's okay?<br/>
"I told you to stop faking, idiot", he said with a weak voice. He was barely holding his tears, so he couldn't even imagine how hard it was for Tsukki.<br/>
Tsukishima didn't reply, so Yamaguchi decided to just hold him and he hold him tight. Even if the blond boy didn't respond for a longer time, he knew he couldn't let go. He wanted Kei to give up to his emotions. To accept them and share them with him. He wanted to help him.<br/>
Eventually it worked.<br/>
"I'm sorry Yams, I don't think I can tell my mom about us soon", he said, cuddling up to him. "I wish we could hang out in my house more but I-"<br/>
"I know Kei. I know and it's okay."<br/>
Tsukki went silent again. Yamaguchi felt that whole his body was shaking, but he wasn't crying. Kei never cried and as much as Tadashi hated that, he was silent as well. Forcing him to express his emotions in other way wasn't something he should do at that moment. All he had to do was to be there and he weren't planning to move anywhere.<br/>
He started singing quietly, to help his boyfriend calm down. He remembered Tsukishima told him that he likes his voice one day, when they were coming back from their first-month anniversary dinner. It was a beautiful night.<br/>
Patting his back gently, he looked at his sister sleeping next to them. The thought sneak to his mind. It would be amazing if they could have a kid one day. Maybe they'd get that chance in the future.<br/>
"You know what Tsukki?", he spoke up, after finishing the song. He felt that Tsukki was much calmer then before, so he wanted to try cheer him up now.<br/>
"What?"<br/>
"Your brother is pretty lame."<br/>
Tsukishima snorted with laughter.<br/>
"Yeah, you're right."<br/>
Yamaguchi moved away, to look Kei in the eyes again. He looked tired, but he was smiling a little.<br/>
"I won't disappear out of nowhere so you have all the time in the world to tell her, when you'll be ready okay? There's no need to rush."<br/>
"I know", the blond responded. Yams send him a warm smile and move from his knees to just sit next to him.<br/>
"Want to go back to the movie?"<br/>
"Actually I think I should be going now. It's getting late." Tsukki put the laptop on the side and stood up. He stretched quickly and offer his hand to Tadashi, so he could help him get up as well. Of course, Yamaguchi grabbed it. "Which hour are you leaving tomorrow?"<br/>
"5AM, mom wants to be at the motel as soon as possible", Tadashi replied, while they left his room. "Why are you asking?"<br/>
"I wanted to come to say goodbye, but I guess I won't be able to." Tsukishima put on his jacket, frowning at the sleeve that tangled up.<br/>
"That's why I'm walking you back." Yamaguchi smiled at him, wrapping a scarf around his neck. Winter was really cold that year.<br/>
Kei didn't reply, waiting for Tadashi, when he was making sure he didn't forgot anything. Eventually, they were able to go out.<br/>
"Man, I really love winter", the shorter one said, after a few minutes of walking.<br/>
"Really?", Tsukishima raised his eyebrows, looking at him.<br/>
"Yeah. Don't you?"<br/>
"Not really."<br/>
"Seriously? Why?" Yamaguchi was genuinely curious. Why wouldn't he like it? For him everything in winter was perfect, especially during the night when they were together. In his house they could cuddle under the blanket, and at the times when they were walking just like then, everything around was beautiful. The sky, the lamps the sound of snow scrunching under Kei's steps, his reddish cheeks it all made a one in a million scene, reserved for Yamaguchi only. He purely loved it.<br/>
"In winter your freckles are fading."<br/>
"H-huh?" Yams started to feel a little bit lost. Was that it? The whole reason? "Isn't it a good thing though? I thought I'd look better without them anyway."<br/>
"And I think you look cute with them", Tsukki responded, rolling his eyes. Tadashi felt his cheeks getting warmer.<br/>
"What even makes them so cute, hm?"<br/>
"Well, sometimes when I'm bored I can search for constellations in them. What's more: counting them is a lot better way to fell asleep then anything else."<br/>
"Is that so...?"<br/>
"Yeah."<br/>
"Does that mean you just like to stare at me?", Yamaguchi asked with an amused smile, while Kei instantly averted his gaze, blushing.<br/>
"I didn't say <em>that</em>, stop assuming", he mumbled.<br/>
"Sorry Tsukk-"<br/>
"But even if, you're my boyfriend, there's nothing wrong with the fact that looking at you make me feel better, is there?"<br/>
Yamaguchi turned red again.<br/>
"N-no... Ugh, how are you always winning this, huh?", Yams asked all abashed, what made Tsukki laugh a little. Ever since they got more comfortable with the fact that they're in an actual relationship, they were having such conversations quiet often, trying to make one another embarrassed. Tadashi was more effective, when they were in front of people, while Tsukishima was always victorious when they were alone. Sometimes it was making their classmates and teammates suspicious about them, but at the same time it was made them feel closer to each other. It was the only reason Yams wanted to continue with it, no matter the consequences.<br/>
"I'm home", Tsukki said, once they got to his house. Tadashi didn't enter, since he was only walking him back anyway.<br/>
"You're finally ba-", Akiteru stopped, when he saw Yamaguchi behind his little brother.<br/>
"Hi, Akiteru" Yams said unsure, but the man was just glaring at him.<br/>
"When there's a guest in the house, you're supposed to greet them back." Kei glared back at his brother.<br/>
"Why did you even bring-"<br/>
"Don't worry about it Kei, we're not staying here for long anyway, are we?"  Yamaguchi smiled to his boyfriend, putting hand on his shoulder, to remind him he's there. He send the same smile to Akiteru. "I'm leaving in the morning, so Kei will be staying at my place for the night. Sorry for interrupting."<br/>
"Exactly, so you can just go back to whatever you were doing" Tsukki said, passing his brother in the corridor, to go for his stuff. Tadashi hoped he won't be mad at him for it, but he just couldn't stand the fact, that Kei would be sleeping here on the same day he was fighting with Akiteru. He wanted to be next to him that night.<br/>
"Are you happy, dragging my brother down with you?", the older Tsukishima said, frowning.<br/>
"Let me just remind you, it's not me who broke him first" he replied coldly. "Now excuse me, but I don't really want to talk to you, <em>Tsukishima-san</em>, so can you leave me alone?"<br/>
Akiteru clenched his fists, but left the corridor, without saying anything more. Kei appeared after few more minutes, so they could leave as well and Yams did it very gladly.<br/>
On their way back to Yams's home, Tsukki suddenly pulled him further from the street lamps. The kiss come unexpected, but Tadashi couldn't help it and smiled with the corners of his mouth.<br/>
"Thank you", Kei said once he pulled back. "But can you stop reading in my mind, it's kinda gross."<br/>
Yamaguchi laughed, grabbing his hand. Yeah, winters were perfect. </p><p>~A Big Bang came<br/>
And they-<br/>
And they died~</p><p>"Tadashi, is everything alright?", Tamotsu asked, when they were having dinner. The teenager raised his sight on his father from a plate that he didn't even touch. He heaved a sigh and push it away.<br/>
"Sorry dad it's just... I didn't heard from Tsukki all day, I'm worried he may be mad at me. I send him a thousand messages but he didn't even read them."<br/>
"I'm sure it's nothing bad honey, maybe he just left his phone in your room and didn't realize it yet" Momoka said, trying to comfort him.<br/>
"Yeah, maybe" Tadashi agreed, even though he didn't believe it. Tsukki would never forget his phone, that would mean no music on his way home. "I think I'll go to our room already."<br/>
"Dashi?" Aiko looked as his brother with teary eyes. The boy raised his eyebrows.<br/>
"What is it Ai-chan?"<br/>
"I had a nightmare..." she started, playing with her fingers. "Tsukki was in hospital. He's alright, right?"<br/>
Tadashi's heart stopped for a moment, but he forced a smile and brushed her hair.<br/>
"Of course he is, no need to worry" he replied, then he just said goodnight to everyone and left to their motel room.<br/>
Once he get there he collapsed on the bed and put his phone out of his pocket, looking emptily on the screen. Last time Tsukki was active, when Yamaguchi was still driving here. His phone died half the way, so he couldn't answer, but once he turned it on, he saw that Kei was trying to reach him. He must have been upset that they left without saying anything, but Tadashi wanted him to rest, so he just left his keys on the desk for the blond boy to use. Was this and one missed call really that bad?<br/>
The phone vibrates and he saw he got a message. He checked it quickly, but unfortunately it wasn't from his boyfriend but from Takeda, their teacher and a supervisor of Karasuno volleyball team. A second later more messages from his teammates started to show up one after another.<br/>
"I heard what happened, I'm really sorry Yamaguchi."<br/>
"My condolences, it must be really hard."<br/>
"OMG, Yams, I'm so sorry! If you need to talk, remember  that I'm here for you alright?"<br/>
Tadashi felt so lost. Why are they sorry? What happened? And... did he really want to know? He finally checked message from his teacher.<br/>
"I already told the rest, but there's something I need to tell you about. Do you mind if I call you?"<br/>
Yamaguchi felt his mouth go dry. Breathing also suddenly seemed much more harder. It was serious, and he really hoped it was just bad feeling and that he was exaggerating.<br/>
"Sure, Mr. Takeda"<br/>
The teacher called him not even a minute after he send a message.<br/>
"H-hello?"<br/>
"Hi, Yamaguchi-kun. I hope I didn't interrupt anything?" His voice was too quiet and too cautious. Tadashi hated that, but he still had hope. Hope that it wasn't related to Tsukki being unavailable.<br/>
"I just finished dinner."<br/>
"I see... I didn't want to ruin your holidays, but I thought you should know. Or maybe you know already, but, ehm, Tsukishima-kun he... He didn't make it. My condolences."<br/>
Tadashi wasn't sure, how long he'd been quiet after hearing that. His head felt dizzy, his chest was in pain and his heartbeat was pulsing in his ears. He needed a lot of time to process what Mr. Takeda just said.<br/>
"W-what?", he asked finally. Considering noise from the other side of the call, his sudden reply must have scared the teacher. "Mr. Takeda, what do you mean by 'didn't make it'? Didn't make it from what?"<br/>
"You didn't know?"<br/>
"Know what?!", he heard his own voice cracking. What the hell happened? Tsukishima couldn't be-, he just couldn't. Yamaguchi didn't even want to thought about it like that. Maybe he had problems with classes? Or maybe they decided to put him on bench? "I'm, I'm sorry."<br/>
"No problem, Yamaguchi-kun. It'll be good if you let your emotions go" Mr. Takeda replied in a gentle tone. Stop. Please just stop making it sounds worse. "I thought Miss Tsukishima already told you, but Tsukishima-kun had an accident at the morning. His condition was a serious death thread and a few minutes ago I got a message from the headmaster. The thread came-"<br/>
Yamaguchi hang off, not letting him finish. It couldn't be true. It was just some seriously messed up joke. How could Tsukki die like that? How could that happen just in a day?<br/>
He wiped tears off his face with a sleeve and looked at his phone again. He picked the number of someone, who could know more about it.<br/>
"Answer, you son of a bitch" he whispered under his breath. His whole body was shaking, but he still had hope. It was a joke. It was a joke.<br/>
"What do you want?"<br/>
"Is this true?!" Tadashi didn't want to shout, but hearing Akiteru's voice was too much. "Is Tsukki-"<br/>
"Oh, so you know."<br/>
"What do you mean by 'oh'?! Akiteru how bad is it?! Why didn't you call me earlier?!"<br/>
"He didn't want me to."<br/>
"Bullshit."<br/>
"That's the truth."<br/>
"Bullshit!" Yamaguchi felt the urge to throw his phone, but he needed to know more. He would prefer talking to their mom, but she must have been devastated as much as he was. Akiteru's voice on the other hand was too calm. That how Tadashi knew he wasn't telling him the truth. "Is he in pain?"<br/>
Kei's brother was silent for a little, but for Yams every second felt like an hour. But he didn't rush him. He knew he wasn't good as well.<br/>
"He was."<br/>
"Does that-"<br/>
"You'd know that if you'd pick up this fucking phone when he was still conscious."<br/>
That words hurt. Yamaguchi had to take a deeper breath, but that wasn't enough. He clenched his fist to the point when his nails cut his skin. It's all because of that stupid battery. He couldn't answer, and so, he was enjoying mountains while Kei was suffering in the hospital. It hurt him so much.<br/>
"When is the funeral?", he asked when he calm down his breath a bit.<br/>
"About that... Don't come."<br/>
"Wha-"<br/>
"There'll be our grandparents Yamaguchi. A whole neighborhood. Uncles, aunties, cousins, his school. Do you really want to make Kei a freak after his death?"<br/>
"A <em>freak</em>? Are you fucking serious?"<br/>
"You can't say it was normal! It was bad for both of you, so just go on, please. I know you were friends. I know it must be hard but-"<br/>
"We were more then friends, and you know that! He told you himself, didn't he?! And all that you did for him was making him feel like shit, because you didn't even try to understand. You're still not trying!" Tadashi didn't care for the fact that the other guests might have heard him. He just simply couldn't stand it. He wanted to tell him everything he keep to himself yesterday, when he saw him after walking Tsukki back. "Only by those two month, he was smiling more then by all those years that passed after you lied to him. He was finally happy! He even wanted to try and trust you once again, and guess what: you put him through pain just like before. You broke one thing that was still bonding two of you together. That he cherished more then you could ever know. And I am the one who's not allowed to go to the funeral? After all this time when I was there for him when you were betraying him all over again?"<br/>
"I just don't want my family to remember him as a pervert!"<br/>
"A pe- You know, scre- fuck you. Fuck. You!"<br/>
Tadashi threw his phone at the wall. He just noticed, that during this talk he had to get up. That at one moment he somehow started crying and that now he's whole collar was wet. That he's throat was burning and his hands were bleeding. He felt like he was about to pass out.<br/>
"Yamaguchi are you there?"<br/>
"Shut up!", he screamed, when it turned out that his phone didn't broke. So he didn't even have that much of strength, huh? To break a fucking phone? He heard someone's footsteps. That someone picked up the thing and hang off, while Yams just sat on the floor.<br/>
"Tadashi, what happened?"<br/>
"He's... I don't want to say it dad. I don't want to." His voice was scratchy and quiet. At this point he didn't even want to live. What was the point, if Tsukki's not there anymore?<br/>
Tamotsu looked at his phone son. After the argument he heard and his teammates messages, he didn't need to ask anymore. He sat next to Tadashi and put an arm around his shoulder, not saying a thing. His son had enough of his own thoughts, he didn't want to mess it up more, when he was already in such a state. </p><p>~Dinosaurs, dinosaurs fell in love~</p><p>The next few days were a nightmare for the freckled boy. He couldn't sleep or eat properly, so his parents agreed that it would be the best for him to take a break from school. When he was finally ready to go, he found his teammates waiting for him at the door.<br/>
"H-hi Yams", Yachi said, and after her Hinata and Kageyama greeted him as well.<br/>
"What are you guys doing here?", he asked, looking at each of them one by one.<br/>
"Yachi said we should come here, so you won't feel lonely going to school!" Hinata explained with a wide smile, jumping enthusiastically. It had always been surprising for Tadashi, how this boy could have so much energy this early in the morning.<br/>
"I was dragged here" Kageyama added, drinking his milk.<br/>
"Oi, Kageyama! Don't be so mean now!" Shouyou shouted.<br/>
"Or?"<br/>
"Boys! Please, it's not helping him!" Yachi panicked, moving her sight from the fighting duo to Yamaguchi all over again.<br/>
"Don't worry, I'm glad that you guys are doing well" Tadashi replied, passing them. Duo stopped their fight, exchanging looks with the girl. They followed him.<br/>
"So... Why didn't you come to the funeral?" Hitoka asked unsure.<br/>
"They didn't allow me to come." Quick response make the three went silent again, which made Yamaguchi felt bad. He shouldn't have been so harsh, they wanted well after all. "Sorry, I... I'm still trying to get through all this."<br/>
"Can I ask why they didn't? You two were close, I don't really understand", Yachi asked again. For a moment Tadashi hesitate to answer, but now that he's no longer here... It wouldn't hurt to tell them the truth, would it?<br/>
"We didn't tell you guys about it, but, ehm, we were in love? We even started dating, but his family-"<br/>
"Wait, wait, wait, recently? Weren't you too together from middle school or something?"Hinata cut across him.<br/>
"I though it was an elementary school thing" Kageyama said, nodding to the human-tangerine's theory.<br/>
"Boys! Seriously, cut it!"<br/>
"But Yachi you told me-"<br/>
"Shouyou, don't tell them that!"<br/>
Yamaguchi smiled a little watching them and put headphones in his ears. He was thankful that they thought of him, but he didn't want to ruin their moods. It was something he needed to deal with himself. That's why he headed first, hoping that they won't notice.<br/>
Or so he thought. He was sure he'd be able to face the reality after all those days, but seeing flowers at Tsukki's desk was too much for him. The pity on his classmates faces also didn't help. Since he entered the class, all his moves were stiff and he felt like he heard everything around twice as loud, but couldn't understand a word. In the middle of the first class his state reached its limit and he just run out of the class. It was his first 'meeting' with Kei, after his death. He wasn't at the cemetery, he didn't even knew which one was it and where he laid. This bunch of flowers was the very first thing that assure him, that Tsukishima died. That it was reality, not a nightmare or a joke. He didn't even noticed, when he  found himself standing in front of Tsukishima's house. </p><p>~But they didn't say goodbye~</p><p>Yamaguchi knocked on the door quickly. He didn't stop until someone opened them and that person turned out to be Tsukki's mother.<br/>
"Tadashi? What- Wait are you crying?"<br/>
"I came for the keys", he said, passing her, going straight to Tsukki's room. Everything was there, as always. His student books, with some fantasy and books about dinosaurs on the shelves. The figures. The closet where he had his clothes, that Tadashi loved to borrow since they were together. Tsukishima was the kind of person, who collected vinyls of his favorite bands, without having anything to play them on. They were there as well. And finally, the bed when they confessed was standing right were it always was.<br/>
He sat there and looked forward at the desk. His sport glasses were there, broken because of his fight with Akiteru. The photos on the wall and those in frames, standing at the back of the furniture.<br/>
A lot of them were from their childhood. Miss Tsukishima was really happy when she found out that Kei had a friend, so she used to take a lot of them. There were also some of the middle school, but the biggest amount were from the past two months. Images that looked innocent. That could be interpret as photos of perfect friendship. But only they knew, what hiding behind them.<br/>
They knew, that the photo from McDonald's when they were sharing fries was the photo of their first date. Kei decided where they went, because he wanted to buy his new partner his favorite food. Tadashi was wondering, if he knew, that he liked soft fries so much because they were reminding him of the blond.<br/>
They knew that when Tsukishima seemed to be showing a signet, it was the one Yamaguchi gave him for his first month anniversary. A signet that he won when they were on a trip in elementary school and got lost together. Yamaguchi remembered how Tsukki mocked him about proposing so soon for the rest of that day.<br/>
And what was that for? Just for them to tear apart? For Kei to die, and Tadashi to sit on this bed, in a cold, dark room, that doesn't even smell like him anymore. Without his sarcastic comments, without his gentle gestures, when he wanted to show that he cares? Without him?<br/>
He stood up, and went to the desk, to grab the photo with a signet. It was a little more then a month before. They were both so happy and-<br/>
And alive.<br/>
Back then they both were alive and Tsukki was with him. Side by side as they were supposed to be forever. It wasn't forever. It wasn't even a decade since they knew each other. You weren't supposed to go so soon Tsukki.<br/>
Yamaguchi started crying again. He wanted to shout, and maybe he even did, he wasn't sure himself. He stared at the picture, thinking about how he messed up.<br/>
He left the house without saying anything.<br/>
He didn't answer the phone.<br/>
He wasn't at the hospital, when Kei needed it.<br/>
He wasn't at his funeral.<br/>
He couldn't even stand sitting next to the empty sit their in class, because before it was him who was there. Not those God damned flowers.<br/>
He knew it wasn't Tsukki that abandoned him. It was him. It was the coward, looking at their photos in his room. This time for sure, he screamed. </p><p>~But they didn't say...</p><p>"Goodbye, Tsukki".</p>
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